Yes, I'm a tall white man. Now that's out of the way.
Pam, on behalf of a world of jerks, I want to apologize. It sounds like we both grew up in a world where everything mattered. Size, color, heck, even shoe size mattered. I'm so grateful for that.
I have two grandchildren that like you are so brave. We've talked for hours about this topic and so much more. These girls are 16 and 21. They are half their mother and half their Samoan Father. Because they look more Samoan they go with that.
The 16 year-old came to me when she was 8 and said, painfully, "why am I so tall (5' 7" at the time)?"
In fact I was the same size as she was at that age.
At some point in the conversation I said, Malia, you may have grown enough. Maybe you won't grow any taller. She looked at me with and older and wiser expression on her face and said, "Papa, that she has sailed."
At 16 she is the same height I was then and her weight is the same as well. I was 6' 3". I weighed 250 to 270 lbs back then. In addition to be my beautiful grandchild, she sings like an angel, beautifully.
Her grandmother, my first wife of almost 26 years was 5' 1 ½" and weighed 98 lbs.
At my size, I was always made fun of by some crowd or another.
In elementary school, I was the only kid that wasn't hispanic. In middle school I was the only kid that wasn't african american. In high school it was 55% Jewish, 20% hispanic and then the rest of us.
At some point, I finally rea;ozed who I was and then I did the rest of the work to become the man I wanted to me. To this day, I hear people say, "You're just poor white trash. You'll always be poor like all of us.
At your age you have to decide who you are beside being a Mother, a great one I'll bet. You must also be very good at the work you do. As a fellow international traveler, I know that none of my people were able to travel like me unless they were nearly as good as I was at closing deals.
Be brave, be you, be proud of who you are. You are the only you. Never settle for less than what you want.
Great story. Thank you for sharing.
DR
